Sleep Learning Method #2– Sleep Shaping with The Pickup/Putdown Method
Do you have a baby who likes to be held while he falls asleep?
Or maybe your little one likes the pacifier, but when it falls out she wakes up?
Are you dealing with early wakings or super-short naps?
Then the Pickup/Putdown Sleep Shaping Method may be worth a try!
Notice that I called this method “Sleep Shaping.” That’s because it is a very ‘hands-on’ approach. And because of this ‘hands-on' approach, I sometimes use it with babies as young as 3 months old. This is the ONLY method I use with 3-month-olds!
A great baby sleep routine is every parent’s ultimate goal. We all know well-rested babies are happier and more content. Well-rested parents are much better off, too!
I have had clients who are dealing with very young babies who are so used to being held to sleep that they cannot seem to fall asleep on their own – EVER!
This is so tiring for parents! When faced with this situation, I help guide parents in implementing the Pickup/Putdown method.
Does it take a lot of stamina? Absolutely! But this is the only acceptable way to help in the shaping of sleep behavior at such a young age, in my opinion. When the health and safety of the parents is being compromised, this method is what is required.
The Pickup/Putdown Sleep Shaping method is ideal for:
Babies 3-6 months old.
Babies who have had a hard time with transitions.
Babies who have difficulty with regulation.
Babies who have been held to sleep a lot.
And for parents:
Who want to be present while their baby learns something new.
Who want to help their baby learn how to soothe themselves gradually with lots of support.
Who want a method that can be used independently at bedtime with or without working on naps.
What is the Pickup/Putdown Method of Sleep Shaping?
The Pickup-Putdown Method is a gentle technique to guide parents as they support their babies to sleep. It was popularized by Tracy Hogg in Secrets of the Baby Whisperer.
It aims to help your baby learn to fall asleep without being held or needing a pacifier (or any other prop!). You can use this method to extend naps, build successful sleep routines, and stop your baby from waking too early.
While Pickup/Putdown is considered a gentle sleep shaping method (since you never leave your baby to cry it out), it’s not entirely a no-cry method.
It involves putting your baby down to sleep and picking them up again if they start to cry. The trick is to do this repeatedly until they settle.
How Does the Pickup/Putdown Method Work?
Pickup/Putdown is a simple technique that will be easy to remember in the wee hours of the morning.
Here are the steps:
1. Wait. If your baby starts to fuss, don’t rush to pick them up straight away. Stop, wait, and listen. Give them a moment (up to 5 minutes depending on the age) to see if they can self soothe.
2. Shush. If they don’t settle, rest your hand on them, pat them gently, and try shushing. This will reassure them that you’re there. This part of the technique is also known as the Shush-Pat method (up to 5 minutes depending on the age).
3. Pick up. If your baby isn’t calmed by shushing, pick them up for a cuddle.
4. Put down. The second your baby stops crying, put them down. Place them on the mattress even if they start to fuss on the way down. Leave your hand on their tummy and speak softly to reassure them that you’re there.
5. Repeat. If your baby starts to cry again, keep picking them up and putting them down. Do this until their crying turns to a whimper or grumble.
6. Comfort. Rest your hand on them and shush or speak softly.
7. Leave. Once your baby has entered a deep sleep, leave the room.
My oldest child - Trace - at 8 months old. Yes, he had a lovey! (The rules were different in 1990!)
At What Age Can I Start Using the Pickup/Putdown Method?
The Pickup-Putdown sleep shaping technique is best used between the ages of 3 and 6 months. Some individuals suggest it can be used to ‘sleep train’ older babies, but I find that it is too stimulating for any baby over 6 months old.
Depending on your child’s temperament, this method may be too stimulating for your baby. You have to be the judge of that.
How Long Does the Pickup/Putdown Method Take?
The first night you try Pickup/Putdown sleep shaping is likely to be a long one. You may need to pick your baby up and put them down over 100 times before they are finally asleep. The average amount of time this takes is 20 minutes, but it could take your little one over an hour.
Each night that follows is likely to be faster until your baby can fall asleep on their own. You should start to see results within the first few days. There should be some significant improvement in a week.
What If the Pickup/Putdown Method Isn’t Working?
If you have seen no progress after a week and your baby is still fighting sleep, try soothing them while they are in the crib by rubbing their head, their back, promoting hand sucking or the pacifier, holding their hand, etc.
Provide verbal and physical soothing without picking up unless the child becomes very upset.
Is the Pickup/Putdown Method Cruel?
As your baby gets used to Pickup/Putdown, there’s likely to be crying. However, you’ll be there with them through it all, and at no point will they feel abandoned. For this reason, Pickup/Putdown is considered to be gentle.
Does the Pickup/Putdown Method Work for Naps?
Yes! This sleep shaping method can help your baby with naps. Use the technique in the same way as at bedtime.
You can also use it to help extend naps. Try it if your little one wakes too early and is still clearly tired after a nap (in other words, they wake up crying). Use the technique when they first wake and see if it helps to get them back to sleep.
FAQs
What If My Baby Keeps Waking Up While Using the Pickup/Putdown Method?
If you are struggling to get your baby to sleep, think about their sleep routine and environment. You might find a solution before giving up.
Sleep Routine. Do the same thing at the same time in the same order. Babies like to know what’s coming next. These sleep cues you give your baby can set them up for readiness to sleep over time. Think about what you do as a routine before bed. You start getting sleepy as you go through each of those steps because your body knows what’s coming next.
Sleep Environment. There are lots of things about your baby’s room that could be affecting their sleep. Ideally, the room should be cool and comfortable—between 68° and 72°F is recommended. You should block out natural light as it can affect their circadian rhythm. Black-out blinds are helpful for this. Finally, noises from outside can disturb your baby’s sleep. A white noise app or machine can be a really useful solution.